Parents-to-Be Play Childish Prank About Baby Name

Lance and Julie Garrick of Denver stooped to a huge low when they told people what they were going to name their unborn baby.

When my sister-in-law was pregnant with her first baby, I asked her if she’d yet decided on a name.

Julie and my brother Lance’s answer was MY birth name (which I won’t reveal).

I won’t reveal my birth name because since teen-hood, I’ve gone by a different name, since I’ve always hated my birth name.

They explained that the baby was due the same month I was born, and if she ended up being born on my birthdate, they’d name her my name.ghlands Ranch, Denver

They did NOT say that this was to honor me.

Rather, it was because that birthdate was a holiday, and the name was associated with the holiday.

I was shocked and calmly protested, because I hated my birth name, and I pointed out that to give their child the same name meant a strong possibility that SHE’D ultimately hate it, too.

Lance and Julie were adamant; they weren’t budging. This topic came up several times, and I couldn’t help but show my distress and anxiety. Highlands Ranch, Denver; Garrick

Before you cast me off as some neurotic meddler, I need to point out that throughout childhood, my birth name gave me a lot of grief and got a lot of negative attention.

A name is not something you can cover up (like pimples or a big mole on one’s nose) or lose (like excess weight) or instantly change (like clothing and hair style). Instead, you are stuck with it, everywhere you go.

I just SO BADLY hoped that my niece would not be born on my birthday.

When Dakota arrived a few weeks prior, I was SO incredibly relieved.

Two years later, the naming topic surfaced when my parents and I were visiting Lance and Julie in their Las Vegas home.

I don’t remember how it came up, but Sis-in-law confessed that they had never considered my name; that “Dakota” had always been their only selected name, right from the start.

My sister-in-law then said that they played a joke on anyone who asked what they were going to name the baby while she was pregnant.

The joke was that they’d answer the name of whomever was asking. So even when they knew the gender of the baby, they’d pretend they didn’t, so when a man – say, Marcus, asked, they’d tell him, “We’re naming him Marcus.”

If someone named Annabelle asked, they’d answer “Annabelle,” and so on.

At the time, Lance was about 48 and Julie was about 36. Is it just me, or was this couple’s game very childish?

I mean, come ON, a 36-year-old and a 48-year-old, getting off on this gag???

Did it never dawn on them that the man or woman, asking if they had a name yet, just might despise their own name?

Maybe Annabelle and Marcus hated their names. Of course, maybe there were a few people who were flattered, too.

But Lance and Julie didn’t have telepathy. They were playing craps with this dumb game. Garrick, Highlands Ranch, Denver

And then they decided to pull it on me, even though it wasn’t a crapshoot with me. They effing KNEW that I hated my real name.

Duhhh! I’d been going by a very different name since high school, and used the new name through college, on the job, EVERYWHERE in life – except on my driver’s license, since the new name wasn’t a legal change.

Duhhh! How stupid must one be NOT to know that I detested my birth name?

But Lance and Julie Garrick pulled the prank on me. Gee, wasn’t it enough entertainment for them to pull it on all the other people who had asked?

Why did they have to include ME in this ridiculous display of immaturity?

At my expense (being distressed), they were entertained. This couple, who called themselves Christians and considered themselves “above” other people in terms of maturity and social graces, couldn’t think of any better way to entertain themselves than to cause me distress by pretending they were going to give their baby my name if she was born on my birthdate!

What classy people. Lance and Julie Garrick

This joke was in very poor taste, especially since – when Lance was in Amway – he’d relentlessly preached the importance of people skills and promoted books about people skills.

Again, before you label me as overly sensitive, let’s look at this for what it truly was.

• A couple, age 36 and 48, got off on telling anyone who asked what they were going to name their baby they’d name it the name of the person asking! How fucking immature.

• They were in contact with many people, so it’s accurate to assume that they played this stupid joke on MANY people.

• But that wasn’t enough. When I asked if they’d chosen a name, they STILL felt they had to play this insensitive prank on ME, even though they full-well knew I hated my birth name.

• People with class don’t do this.

If they wanted to keep “Dakota” a secret, they could have just answered, “We have no idea yet.”

And when you think about it, it was even cruel to anyone who LOVES their name and was flattered by their answer, because then ultimately, that individual — let’s say Cassandra — would wonder why they ended up naming the kid “Dakota” instead!

So either way, it was a classless, childish prank. I might add that my brother eventually told Dakota (when she was a child) my real name, even though she had always known me as “Aunt (my chosen name since high school).

Why would my brother do this? What a dbag. Of course, he had told his wife, too, at some point.

Why? There was absolutely NO reason for my sister-in-law or niece to know my birth name. It never came up in daily living, so why would he reveal this personal information?

When I questioned him about this, he replied that I had never instructed him not to.

So even though, since high school, I had abandoned my birth name, and ALWAYS introduced myself as my chosen name to new people, employers, etc., and had always insisted that immediate and extended family members address me by my new name beginning in high school – Lance claimed he needed instructions from me not to reveal the birth name to his wife and child.

How dense can this man be? No, he’s not THAT stupid. He tossed out his feeble excuse because I caught him off guard. The real reason is…I’ll never know.

But when I told him not to ever tell his younger child (a toddler at the time), he actually said he WOULD eventually tell the boy!

Why? Why? Why?

So there goes the “You never gave me instructions” credibility.