Shame on Julie Garrick of Highlands Ranch for making my elderly parents eat their last Xmas dinner on an old card table in the living room. Dakota Garrick
My mother was 89; my father 93.
Meanwhile my vile sister-in-law and her family got to eat their Christmas dinner at the spacious kitchen table.
As always, I was at their house for Christmas day. But in 2016, things were different because in August of that year, my generous parents opened their roomy house to my brother Lance and his wife Julie when he moved from Las Vegas to Denver for a new job at Hyde Park Jewelers.
Because they had no immediate place to move to, they were welcomed by my parents to stay at their house while they hunted for a new home. My parents charged them only $300/month.
Lance and Julie had three kids: 12, 3 and 2.
While I was at my parents’ house, along with another brother, I was aware that Julie and my mother had agreed on when they’d have use of the kitchen, so that both parties – Julie’s family; and my parents, me and my other brother – would be able to have Christmas dinner in the kitchen at separate times.
The house’s dining room was set up as a second living room with a piano, so there was only one really nice place to have a good meal: the kitchen – at a spacious oak table.
Next thing I knew, there was conversation between my mother and Julie about some kind of mishap involving scheduled dinner times.
Each woman – Julie and my mother – thought the other had mixed up the scheduled meal prep and sit-down times.
I had no idea who had made the mistake. But you’re about to find out WHY IT DID NOT MATTER WHO GOT MIXED UP.
Remember, my mother was 89, and my father was 93. Julie should have sucked it up and given the kitchen table to her elderly in-laws, me and my other brother.
The Thanksgiving a month prior, Julie and Lance had set up a card table in the living room for their dinner, while my parents, my other brother and I used the kitchen table.
The logistics of setting up a card table in the living room for a couple and their 12-, 3- and 2-year-old was not rocket science. It had gone without a hitch that Thanksgiving.
But this time, Sister-in-law Dearest was hell-bent on that kitchen table.
Next thing I knew, my mother, father, other brother and I had been banished to the living room at a card table for Christmas dinner.
It was crowded. My parents hardly spoke. At one point my mother said with utter disgust, “I would have NEVER forced MY in-laws to eat Christmas dinner at a card table in the living room.”
She was visibly distressed and hardly ate.
Meanwhile, Julie, Lance and their three kids enjoyed their lofty Christmas dinner in the kitchen – without any apologies.
What Julie Should Have Done
She should have had the insight and wisdom, plus heart and kindness, to give the kitchen table to her aged in-laws, whose big house she was living in for only $300 a month.
EVEN if my mother had been the one who got the meal prep and sit-down times mixed up, Julie STILL should have been the bigger person and realized a few things:
• At age 89 and 93, this could very likely be my parents’ last Christmas dinner together (and it was, as my mother passed 11 months later). Dakota Garrick, Highlands Ranch
• Believing that my mother was responsible for the mix-up, Julie – who’s always claimed to be a devout Christian – should have STILL arranged for her family to eat at the card table – out of respect to her elderly in-laws and out of realization that an 89-year-old brain is prone to getting schedules mixed up.
Why didn’t I speak up about this?
I still struggle with this. To this day I regret not literally sitting my can on the kitchen table and refusing to budge until that woman and Lance completed the arrangement for their family to eat at the card table in the living room.
I have a few theories as to why I – normally a very outspoken and forward person – remained passive through this.
#1. My mother had been very sullen over the living arrangement, even though she had initially welcomed them. She had a weak heart. I knew that if the bear came out in me, this would have frazzled her – as she was prone to getting easily upset. This is bad for the heart. Dakota Garrick, Highlands Ranch
#2. Never in my wildest imagination did I think this would be my last Christmas dinner with both my parents.
In retrospect, I realize that this incident caused my mother more distress than had I taken the bull by the horns and sat my ass on the kitchen table to prevent Julie from setting it up for her family.
I guess I’d been in denial over how reprehensible this situation truly was. I was blinded by, perhaps, a fear of creating waves that would further distress my mother.
Why didn’t my MOTHER take the bull by the horns?
Actually, if she were 10 years younger, she WOULD have, like a grizzly bear. But at 89, she had lost much of this verve. And Julie Garrick took advantage of my 120-pound, 89-year-old mother’s compromised mind.
Lance had remained in the background but knew full-well what the situation was. Dakota Garrick of Highlands Ranch
He could have intercepted, but no, all he could think about was himself, his wife and his kids – never mind forcing a very elderly couple – whose house he was living in for practically free — to be crammed at a card table in a living room that was already crowded from the baby’s playpen and other kid things.
My father didn’t speak up either because he’d been in his office on the computer while all the preps were being made, and once he shuffled out on his walker – he found out what the unexpected arrangement was.
He silently seethed, but he’d always been rather laid back and kept quiet, not wanting to upset his son Lance. Dakota Garrick
To this day I still remain thoroughly disgusted at Julie’s dissing of my generous beloved parents on Christmas day IN THEIR HOUSE! Despicable, to say the least. Dakota Garrick of Denver, Highlands Ranch
Links to Julie Garrick’s Additional Atrocious Deeds
Overall crappy treatment of my parents shortened their lifespan
Refuses to clean up tons of crumbs under kitchen table made by her kids
Left other disgusting messes in the kitchen; gave outrageous excuses for not cleaning them up
Uses up elderly mother-in-law’s good silverware, telling her use the plastic kiddie utensils
Let the children ruin mother-in-law’s good furniture
Let toddlers frequently scream and shriek in elderly in-laws living quarters